Post by Betelgeuse XII on Sept 16, 2006 16:57:03 GMT -5
UKFA Press Releases - Round 19
A report from Joolsdom's FA
Meles sacked as police press charges
Alex Meles has today been sacked by Joolsdom Forest after police charged him with extortion and fraud.
It is alleged that Meles is involved in a multi-million groat corruption scandal targeted at GMPVâ„¢, Forest's sponsor.
Although details are sketchy it is alleged that a rival distiller aimed to discredit GMPV's reputation in the hope of promoting its own brand. Although no brand has yet been named, Connor Daucus, CEO of GMCW Distilleries, was himself taken into custody for questioning today.
It is believed that police also want to question Franz Dachs regarding the allegations, although it is rumored that he left the country shortly after his suspension.
McGhee will stay as caretaker manager until the plans for a replacement can be formalised.
The team was said to be shocked by the news, which was borne out by Forest's first loss since Meles' suspension on Tuesday. Let's hope they can get back on form before their next CoR match against Costanzia JV.
A report from the Costanzia Sports Network
kMa linked to Mallo-Zizou headbutting scandal
Costanzia Sports Network
Breaking news out of the Durham Police Dept. as Bill Mallo started naming names.
He claims that even though there was an out of court settlement reached between the Mallo Family and Costanzian manager Zénadine Zidane as well as the CFA, the family has been in ruin and that they have become the laughing stock of their town. He claims that unidentified agents from the Failure of kikMyArm, presumably footie fans, were looking for a way to sabotage the Jon Voights, as their own team has slipped a bit as of late. They offered fame and fortune and the restoration of his family's good name. Bill Mallo was uncertain whether these kMa-ites were affiliated with either the kMa government, Football Association, or perhaps maybe even the Mafia. Either way, the now international affair is being picked up by the Costanzian Bureau of Investigation's international arm. Zidane is still in the hospital, and while his condition is improving, he is still at least a week away from returning to the sidelines.
News wasn't all bad however as CJV won out in the group stage of CoR play going undefeated. Tim Wadley, the interim manager, was excited about the success in his first foray into head coaching. But he is anxious for the return of his mentor Zizou. CJV, the only team perfect thus far in the CoR tournament, will be the top seed in the knockout stages. Their next game is against the surging Forest squad that beat JV quite handily just recently in league play. But spirits are high as the Jon Jons have won 3 straight matches, and haven't lost in their last 5. Costanzia have never beat Joolsdom at the Ibrox.
A report from Betelgeuse XII's FA
Racing Club manager unimpressed by recent form
Racing Club de Betelgeuse XII's manager has ordered his team to shape up ahead of their home match against KikMYarm Argyle.
Racing Club have slipped to third in the UKFA Premier League after a disappointing run of form which has seen them earn only two points from their last three games. They also finished a poor second to Costanzia Jon Voights in Group A of the Cup of Regions, winning only half their games and losing the other half.
Speaking to the press ahead of Saturday's game, Racing Club manager CAT5 had this to say: "We get bad run of form, in football it happen. But all our effort must belong to getting back on track our season. I will set up the team some tactical change to freshen us up - competition for places and right attitude will make us success. Bonus get!"
Typically enigmatic words from Racing Club's manager, but only time will tell if his side's lethargy is the beginning of the end of their title defence, or merely a mid-season blip.
UKFA HQ
A report from Joolsdom's FA
Meles sacked as police press charges
Alex Meles has today been sacked by Joolsdom Forest after police charged him with extortion and fraud.
It is alleged that Meles is involved in a multi-million groat corruption scandal targeted at GMPVâ„¢, Forest's sponsor.
Although details are sketchy it is alleged that a rival distiller aimed to discredit GMPV's reputation in the hope of promoting its own brand. Although no brand has yet been named, Connor Daucus, CEO of GMCW Distilleries, was himself taken into custody for questioning today.
It is believed that police also want to question Franz Dachs regarding the allegations, although it is rumored that he left the country shortly after his suspension.
McGhee will stay as caretaker manager until the plans for a replacement can be formalised.
The team was said to be shocked by the news, which was borne out by Forest's first loss since Meles' suspension on Tuesday. Let's hope they can get back on form before their next CoR match against Costanzia JV.
A report from the Costanzia Sports Network
kMa linked to Mallo-Zizou headbutting scandal
Costanzia Sports Network
Breaking news out of the Durham Police Dept. as Bill Mallo started naming names.
He claims that even though there was an out of court settlement reached between the Mallo Family and Costanzian manager Zénadine Zidane as well as the CFA, the family has been in ruin and that they have become the laughing stock of their town. He claims that unidentified agents from the Failure of kikMyArm, presumably footie fans, were looking for a way to sabotage the Jon Voights, as their own team has slipped a bit as of late. They offered fame and fortune and the restoration of his family's good name. Bill Mallo was uncertain whether these kMa-ites were affiliated with either the kMa government, Football Association, or perhaps maybe even the Mafia. Either way, the now international affair is being picked up by the Costanzian Bureau of Investigation's international arm. Zidane is still in the hospital, and while his condition is improving, he is still at least a week away from returning to the sidelines.
News wasn't all bad however as CJV won out in the group stage of CoR play going undefeated. Tim Wadley, the interim manager, was excited about the success in his first foray into head coaching. But he is anxious for the return of his mentor Zizou. CJV, the only team perfect thus far in the CoR tournament, will be the top seed in the knockout stages. Their next game is against the surging Forest squad that beat JV quite handily just recently in league play. But spirits are high as the Jon Jons have won 3 straight matches, and haven't lost in their last 5. Costanzia have never beat Joolsdom at the Ibrox.
A report from Betelgeuse XII's FA
Racing Club manager unimpressed by recent form
Racing Club de Betelgeuse XII's manager has ordered his team to shape up ahead of their home match against KikMYarm Argyle.
Racing Club have slipped to third in the UKFA Premier League after a disappointing run of form which has seen them earn only two points from their last three games. They also finished a poor second to Costanzia Jon Voights in Group A of the Cup of Regions, winning only half their games and losing the other half.
Speaking to the press ahead of Saturday's game, Racing Club manager CAT5 had this to say: "We get bad run of form, in football it happen. But all our effort must belong to getting back on track our season. I will set up the team some tactical change to freshen us up - competition for places and right attitude will make us success. Bonus get!"
Typically enigmatic words from Racing Club's manager, but only time will tell if his side's lethargy is the beginning of the end of their title defence, or merely a mid-season blip.
UKFA HQ