Foreign Update III

[Matlack]

Regional Update III[/font][/i]



Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Population: 128 Nations
Regional Power: Moderate
UN Delegate: Matlack

Government[/u]
Stable - All Governmental Positions In Place, New Constitution

Weekly Citizen Honors[/u]

From here forward, I will be beginning each Foreign Update with recognition of an outstanding citizen. This bi-month, we of La Mafia see fit to honor ToraErulastiel, a member of our Judicial Council and a Senator for her ongoing loyalty to the region. One of the first members and definitely one of the most loyal. She has overcome great tragedy (such as the incident in our Pirate RolePlay) and has come out against attempted bribery. This week, we honor thee, Tora.

Bi-Monthly Interview[/u]
From here forward as well, each edition will include an interview with someone registered on the forums. For this edition, we recognize a foreign ambassador from Europeia, Pineapleboy. To give a sample, we asked Pineapleboy many questions, including interesting answers, like his constant obsession with the online MMORPG, RuneScape. Following this update, the interview will be posted.

Yet another Scandal!?[/u]

That’s right. Another scandal in La Mafia’s forums. However, it involves neither Tom, Sci&Faith, but our great Chancellor, Noah, a soldier, Blink, and a senator, Tora. Noah, the Chancellor of La Mafia, was voting against the Mandatory Recruiting Bill, and supposedly asked Blink to try and persuade Tora to vote against this. Tora came out against this and proceedings are currently at a stand still.

Elections Update[/u]

After the announcement of the elections this March, some important people have announced their candidacy. For senate, we have Blink, the Don, Spectre, and Drumman running. Drumman seeks to regain his spot as Minister of Internal Affairs. Sci&Faith wants to take the Cultural Secretary spot for his own. The Don wants to be the Grand Commandant, and Matlack, Blink, Spectre, and Drumman seek the Judge positions.

Mandatory Recruitment Controversy[/u]

This bill passed by an incredibly low margin. This has sparked a lot of controversy, especially because almost the entire government will be up for possible suspension the first week in. Some people find it incredibly punitive on the people, and some have even protested to a point of leaving their important positions. This is a huge issue with La Mafia, as its forums have never been so quiet in its entire existence.

Current Government Positions[/u]
Monarchy
The Godfather – Don Corleone
Executive
Prime Minister – Stratus
Chancellor – Noah
Minister of Foreign Affairs – Matlack
Minister of Internal Affairs – Drumman
Cultural Secretaries – Fexn and Ramis
Grand Commandant – Don Corleone
Legislative
Speaker of the Senatorial Council – Don Corleone
Senators – Ramis, Noah, Fexn, Stratus, ToraErulastiel
Judicial
Supreme Judge – Matlack
Judges – ToraErulastiel, Drumman, Fexn, Osafune

Asteroids… AK47s… Poker… and Lira?[/u]
Yep, that’s right! The La Mafian Department of Commerce and the La Mafian Department of Immigration have worked together to bring citizens and ambassadors alike a fun experience with a La Mafian Arcade, Battle Shop, Casino, and a Bank. It is likely that there will be wages for jobs performed in La Mafia as well. At the moment, they’ve been an absolute hit, with Mr Saturn being the clear frontrunner in the arcade. In the battle area, guilds are allowed. Because of how the money is not yet set for inflation, buying a guild is like going down to the nearest gas station and buying a pop.

The Civilian Protection Party[/u]
Matlack, myself, has recently formed a new left-leaning party known as the Civilian Protection Party, or CPP. The party is formed to oppose the conservative government party and to support the recently-in-the-news civilian’s rights.

The Federal Conservative Party[/u]
Moments after the announcement of the CPP, the Godfather renamed and reformed his party, the newly named Federal Conservative Party, to try to meet the high standards of the CPP.


The Interview[/u]
Without further ado, I bring you, the interview with Pineapleboy. Bold is me, normal is Pineapleboy.

1. How many cats do you have?

2. Why did you choose a pacific fruit as your name?

3. Of any government official in LM, who is the coolest?

4. Of all government officials in EUROP, who is the most annoying?

5. .... The most interesting?

6. The Don... how much do you despise that lovable critter?


1. One, named "The Cat."

2. When I was in sixth grade, I had a friend named Rory. We liked to talk about random things, and one of those things was the origin of the pineapple. After that went on for a while, he once called me Pineapple-boy, and I quite liked the name

I started spelling it 'Pineapleboy' when I signed up for Runescape and 'Pineappleboy' was taken

3. That would be a tough decision...there are several vying for it.

4. In the past, P.R.A, though he's gone now. He would come up with ideas that would end up being bad for the region (like mandatory education in the University), than call everyone corrupt when it failed. Reason was not his friend

5. Pez201. His posts are always entertaining. Case and point:

After a conversation with a mate of mine, I now turn the debate over to the fine citizens of Europeia to make their decision...

Hot or not?

6. Hmmm... on a scale of 1 to Odious Fiend I would give him a... 7. He has it coming for not joining my political party in Europeia

1. Why did you name him "The Cat"?

2. RuneScape... I have evil memories. Why in the world would someone of your oddness choose a game that has been proven to cause testicular cancer?

3. Don't pass this question. Answer needed.

4. P.R.A means...?

5. Pez seems screwed up. Please ask him to enter a mental hospital, on... err... your behalf.

6. Odious Fiend would be what number on this scale of yours?

7. For every member of Europeia, La Mafia has 1.571428571 (Truly). Why is this, when Europeia is much greater and older?

Thank you for your time, Doctor Dolittle.

1. I got her when he showed up on my porch one day. She was so fat that my family and thought that she was pregnant, so we fed her some leftovers, and she stayed

We meant to name her at first, but we didn't really have a unified effort and she didn't really respond to it, so eventually we just officially dubbed her, "The Cat."

2. It was a few years ago I had a lot friends who played it and it was good for a free game. I regret nothing

3. Well, right now I have been exposed the most to you, the Don, and Stratus, and from what I've seen, you seem like the right choice at this point

4. I have not idea I suppose that it was the initials for his nation, but that's just a guess. He was F.R.A in the next region he joined, I believe.

5. When the time is right

6. Nobody knows for sure, but many experts agree that it is probably 10.

8. Because the Don is a recruiting beast


1. How very lazy.

2. Regretting nothing is regrettable.

3. Best answer so far.

4. Not knowing is also regrettable.

5. When is the time ever right?

6. Experts are idiots.

8. Why did you choose to replace the number 7 with an 8? And calling the Don a beast is against your Foreign Policy, as set down by the honorable Cordova I.

32. If there are three coconuts in a towel and four of them kill a dog, why did they do this?

Thank you.

1. We are but simple folk

5. When he posts something else random or in the spam forum

6. This is true, but the answer was derived by analysis of the better defined the 1-Lord Alphaneisa scale, Lord Alphanesia being about equivalent to 15. Since, on a 1-10 scale, LA scores about a 10 and an odious fiend would only score about a 6.66, we can deduce by extrapolation that Odious fiend is the equivalent of 10 on this variant scale, though this is just a theory.

8. I just have a peculiar affinity for the number 8

32. This all just a matter of symbolism. The towel represents the Cold-war era Iron Curtain, in which the Soviet Union and Eastern Europe was encompassed. The coconuts represent the Communists. Though they have ideas that are great in theory, the milk and meat of the coconut, that has been encompassed in a hard, rough exterior, which really forms the identity of the seed. The Dog, which is much bigger and more powerful, represents the capitalists leaders, who were in control despite being less in number. The appearance of the fourth coconut represents the Communist uprising, when they gained greater support and, both literally and figuratively, killed the capitalist leadership, thereby taking control of the "towel."

Also, judging by the characterization of the Capitalists as "dogs" one would assume that the inventer of this seemingly simple scenario had a particular pro-Communist bent



Apologies for the odd format. It is how it fell out. =P


Official Update from The La Mafian Department of Foreign Affairs
Written/Edited by: Matlack, Minister of Foreign Affairs for La Mafia