Post by kattaia on Nov 14, 2005 11:23:52 GMT -5
With its population already well past the 250 million mark, Kattaia hereby lays claim to area 121. We hope this will be accepted by all of Hyrule and we welcome trade with everyone.
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Recent news dispatches from the News Agency of Kattaia:
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Today the National Assembly debated the government's proposal to annex Outer Iruvia (ooc: area 121). The Assembly unanimously supported the idea of annexing some territory, but the question of whether to annex Outer Iruvia or the Hopeless Desert (ooc: area 120) caused some debate. In particular, Temudzhin Wolfprince, Great Leader of the Libertarian Nationalists, an opposition party, supported both positions in turn. Excerpts from his speech:
"... so I say, for the sake of the farmers, the backbone of our great nation, we must choose a fertile area, we must choose Outer Iruvia! We need more land where we can grow food for our burgeoning population, where our farmers can stand on their own two legs and say, 'This land is mine! Here I will grow food to feed my family and my nation, and let none take this from me!' I say, do not let the machinations of Big Oil deceive us into taking a worthless..."
At this stage a courier delivered a slip of paper to him, and he went on,
"that is, um, let us not be deluded into letting this great wealth of oil slip from our fingers, this lifeblood of an industrialized nation, merely for the purpose of favoring a backward segment of our population, still stuck in an agricultural era! We must at all costs choose the so-called Hopeless Desert..."
Puzzled, our correspondent asked a source what was going on. The source, who declines to be identified, opined that the oil lobby had just outbid the Agrarian League for the support of the Libertarian Nationalists. Mr Wolfprince went on in this vein for a while, then another slip of paper was delivered, and he then spoke:
"... but, what good is that black gunk to a starving nation? We must choose a land with fertile soil, as befits a nation with a proud tradition of independent yeomen, beholden to nobody..."
In the final voting, 163 of the 198 delegates present voted for Outer Iruvia, while 48 voted for the Hopeless Desert. The Libertarian Nationalist party had voted twice, and when the Speaker of the Assembly ruled that their votes would therefore be discarded, they marched out in protest. The final vote tally was thus 150 votes for Outer Iruvia and 35 for the Hopeless Desert.
***
There were over a hundred people gathered in a village square in Outer Iruvia. The representative of the Kattaian government opened his satchel and took out some glittering objects. "See these gems, how they glitter! We will offer you all of these for your land..."
"Hrmpf!" the headman said. "Mattsson, will you take a look at these?"
An elderly man took out a magnifying glass and scrutinized the offerings closely. Then he snorted. "Glass baubles! Witha few synthetic rubies and sapphires thrown in, maybe as a sop to their consciences if they have any."
The headman told the Kattaian representative, "We reject your offer. However, we're willing to lease you a quarter of a hectare of land for five years in exchange for laptops for everybody, a link to the Internet with a capacity of at least 50 gigabits per second. Our lawyer has already drawn up an agreement..."
The dickering went on late into the night. At the end the Kattaian representative finally signed an agreement. Waking up the next morning and looking at what he had signed, he found he had promised the villagers 4,531,917,612 lousydors for a 20-year lease on two hectares of swamp and the right to build a golf course there.
=====
Recent news dispatches from the News Agency of Kattaia:
***
Today the National Assembly debated the government's proposal to annex Outer Iruvia (ooc: area 121). The Assembly unanimously supported the idea of annexing some territory, but the question of whether to annex Outer Iruvia or the Hopeless Desert (ooc: area 120) caused some debate. In particular, Temudzhin Wolfprince, Great Leader of the Libertarian Nationalists, an opposition party, supported both positions in turn. Excerpts from his speech:
"... so I say, for the sake of the farmers, the backbone of our great nation, we must choose a fertile area, we must choose Outer Iruvia! We need more land where we can grow food for our burgeoning population, where our farmers can stand on their own two legs and say, 'This land is mine! Here I will grow food to feed my family and my nation, and let none take this from me!' I say, do not let the machinations of Big Oil deceive us into taking a worthless..."
At this stage a courier delivered a slip of paper to him, and he went on,
"that is, um, let us not be deluded into letting this great wealth of oil slip from our fingers, this lifeblood of an industrialized nation, merely for the purpose of favoring a backward segment of our population, still stuck in an agricultural era! We must at all costs choose the so-called Hopeless Desert..."
Puzzled, our correspondent asked a source what was going on. The source, who declines to be identified, opined that the oil lobby had just outbid the Agrarian League for the support of the Libertarian Nationalists. Mr Wolfprince went on in this vein for a while, then another slip of paper was delivered, and he then spoke:
"... but, what good is that black gunk to a starving nation? We must choose a land with fertile soil, as befits a nation with a proud tradition of independent yeomen, beholden to nobody..."
In the final voting, 163 of the 198 delegates present voted for Outer Iruvia, while 48 voted for the Hopeless Desert. The Libertarian Nationalist party had voted twice, and when the Speaker of the Assembly ruled that their votes would therefore be discarded, they marched out in protest. The final vote tally was thus 150 votes for Outer Iruvia and 35 for the Hopeless Desert.
***
There were over a hundred people gathered in a village square in Outer Iruvia. The representative of the Kattaian government opened his satchel and took out some glittering objects. "See these gems, how they glitter! We will offer you all of these for your land..."
"Hrmpf!" the headman said. "Mattsson, will you take a look at these?"
An elderly man took out a magnifying glass and scrutinized the offerings closely. Then he snorted. "Glass baubles! Witha few synthetic rubies and sapphires thrown in, maybe as a sop to their consciences if they have any."
The headman told the Kattaian representative, "We reject your offer. However, we're willing to lease you a quarter of a hectare of land for five years in exchange for laptops for everybody, a link to the Internet with a capacity of at least 50 gigabits per second. Our lawyer has already drawn up an agreement..."
The dickering went on late into the night. At the end the Kattaian representative finally signed an agreement. Waking up the next morning and looking at what he had signed, he found he had promised the villagers 4,531,917,612 lousydors for a 20-year lease on two hectares of swamp and the right to build a golf course there.